So blogging seems to be all the rage now. It seems funny that when I was a kid growing up, I used to keep a lock on my diary. The thought of anyone reading it was just awful. And to be honest, when I read back through some of my diary posts from the 80s and 90s, they make me cringe. First crush, first kiss, first period, first time…yep you name it, it’s written down. Honestly, I should take those books and burn them. Burn them and never look back! And there is some really mean stuff in there! Bitchy teenage gossip and angst mostly but some things I wouldn’t want to share even now! Blogging is a funny thing because now it seems people are quite happy to share their thoughts and feelings with the whole world. I don’t think I am quite ready to share ALL my thoughts and past diary entries with the world just yet;)
But here we go, my first “blog post” 1980s style.
I remember getting this diary. From an aunt and uncle. I wasn’t quite sure what to do at first. So I just wrote. And I wrote and wrote, until I was about 23 or so. I mainly wrote about how bloody scared I was of being sick. I stopped writing when I moved in with my guy. I tried to restart when I was pregnant but I just couldn’t get back in to it. This is my attempt now to reflect, write, remember and share my thoughts. I know I shouldn’t have regrets but I really wish I’d written more as a kid. There are so many gaps and it would be lovely to fill them now. I also really really regret not keeping things – letters, notes. That kind of stuff. I don’t know why I have this urge to look back on life when I know I should be looking forward. I feel like I’m old. like the best bits of my life are over now. Urgh I don’t know. Maybe all this self reflection isn’t a good idea…we shall see.